In the last blog “Stuck in a Rut? Identifying the Hidden Barriers to Healthier Habits,” we explored how habitual patterns are created through our beliefs, emotional patterns, and environmental cues to create stability and serve essential functions in our lives that make changing these patterns challenging. We also considered the factors hindering us from forming the habits we desire.
While our routines offer security and reduce decision fatigue, they can also trap us in unhealthy cycles, providing immediate comfort at the expense of long-term well-being. This post dives deeper into how our habits serve us and how we can intentionally shift them to enhance our lives. Why do we cling to behaviors that we know aren’t in our best interest? Most importantly, how can we gently unravel these threads to guide ourselves towards more intentional actions and healthier choices? This blog offers you space to think new thoughts and envision new possibilities.
Our Habits Serve Us in Practical Ways
Here we identify the roles our habits play in our lives and later introduce some practical tools to understand the deeper reasons behind our resistance to change. By identifying how our habits are currently serving us with compassion and curiosity, we can begin to transform our relationship with them and take meaningful steps forward, moving closer to our goals with each intentional act.
Reevaluating Time Savings: The True Cost of ‘Quick Fixes’
Busy schedules, work commitments, family responsibilities and other time constraints can make prioritizing home cooking and exercise challenging. Initially, these choices may seem to free up our schedules, allowing us to dedicate more time to work or family. Regularly opting for convenience over quality in our diets or neglecting physical activity can lead to health issues such as weight gain, decreased energy levels, and chronic conditions.
In what ways is time currently limiting the lifestyle habits you’d like to maintain, and how might this be impacting your health?
Stress Reduction: Quick Escapes
Many of us turn to certain habits as immediate stress relievers—smoking a cigarette, comfort eating, a glass or two of alcohol, binge-watching a favorite show, or scrolling through social media. While these activities might provide a quick escape from daily pressures, they can become problematic coping mechanisms. Over time, reliance on such habits can lead to negative health outcomes, such as respiratory problems from smoking or sleep disturbances from excessive screen time. More critically, they often prevent us from addressing the underlying causes of our stress, delaying more effective and healthier management strategies.
What small change can you make today that might reduce your stress without long-term drawbacks?
Comfort and Reward
While certain habits like comfort eating, binge watching tv or scrolling social media can bring immediate pleasure and emotional relief, they can also lead to unhealthy patterns if not balanced with awareness and moderation.
Social Connection
These activities strengthen bonds and provide a sense of belonging, but they can also lead us to engage in behaviors that may not align with our personal health goals. Social habits, like drinking, smoking, or joining friends for late-night outings and unhealthy meals, often revolve around deeply ingrained social norms and peer influences. It’s vital to reflect on how these social rituals affect your health and whether they truly serve our best interests or if they could be modified to maintain social ties while also honoring our wellness.
Energy Management and Coping Mechanisms
To combat low energy and high stress, many of us develop habits like reaching for caffeine multiple times a day, skipping exercise, and finding comfort mechanisms like food, caffeine, alcohol, binge watching TV or scrolling social media. However, over the long term these ultimately lead to:
- uncontrolled stress and elevated cortisol levels,
- dysregulated nervous system
- dysregulated circadian rhythms and disrupted sleep cycles,
- hormonal impacts,
- increased anxiety.
Identifying how we are using coping mechanisms to manage our energy can help us open new possibilities for more sustainable energy management methods which can provide rejuvenation without adverse health effects.
Practical Steps for Embracing Behaviors that Serve Our Highest Vision
Identifying how our habits are currently serving us is a means to transform our relationship with them. The real change comes when we actively reshape these habits.
Just a quick side note. I acknowledge that it is often emotional and unconscious factors that often hold us back. Stay tuned for other blogs in this series if you are still feeling stuck and change feels out of reach.
First, we must recognize that resistance is a normal response, not a personal failure.
- Accept where we are in the journey,
- Let go of “comparisons” and “shoulds”
- Know that it’s ok to co-exist with our fears and beliefs that hold us back rather than fighting against them.
Accepting it without judgment can reduce its power and help you begin addressing it constructively.
Step 1: Identify How the Habit Currently Serves You
Reflect: Take a moment to identify the habit you want to change and understand how it serves you. Does it save time? Reduce stress? Offer comfort?
- If we are cutting corners to squeeze more out of each day, how do you measure these temporary gains against potential long-term costs to well-being
- Are we eating for emotional reasons or hunger?
- Are the demanding life circumstances we are in resulting in unfulfilled needs causing us to seek out coping mechanisms or reduce energy expenditure?
Assess: Consider the long-term effects of the habit on your health and life.
- Are there negative impacts that outweigh the immediate benefits?
- What small adjustments would help you make time for these habits?
- What areas of longing do you need support around and what are possible sources of support?
Step 2: Set Realistic Expectations
- Most people can manage only 1 – 2 major changes at a time.
- Current research shows that how long it takes to form a new habit can vary widely depending on the behavior, person, and circumstance. The average amount of time is 66 days (about 2 months), however that could extend up to 254 days.
Step 3: Plan Before Taking Action:
- Identify a specific outcome that you want to achieve and one behavior you want to start to move toward that outcome.
- Imagine all the steps that you would undertake before performing the behavior and what steps you will perform after.
- Neuroscience shows that “rewarding yourself” while performing the hard part of the activity also sets in motion the habit formation you need to make the habit stick. Finding reward while performing the hard part provides the hit of dopamine (the pleasure and reward neurotransmitter) that will keep you coming back for more.
- What are the challenges you will face? What would it take to get past these? What has worked in the past and what do you need to avoid?
- What information or support do you need? Can you engage a friend with a similar goal, join a support group, research the top 3 popular solutions or work with a coach?
Step 4: Define New Possibilities
Imagine the healthiest version of yourself. Remove the filter of limitation and imagine ALL of the possible ways your life could improve by changing this habit. Visualize the physical health benefits, enhanced mental clarity, and emotional stability that will allow you to continue pursuing further goals that bring meaning and purpose as defined by yourself. A good vision should feel “expansive” and a stretch which will help you reach the next level. If it doesn’t feel a little bit scary, its probably not big enough.
Imagine by making the desired lifestyle changes, you not only improve your current health metrics—such as weight, blood pressure, and fitness level—but also contribute to a longer, more active life, increased mental health and well-being, greater life satisfaction and feelings of achievement, and build resilience against future stressors and challenges.
I personally plan and like a structured approach when I am ready to start a new habit. I print a calendar and hang it on the wall, then mark off 66 days (about 2 months). Each day, as I take action steps towards that behavior, I check it off. This visual helps me monitor progress and is incredibly motivating for me, making my goals clear and timebound. At the end of the 66 days, I assess whether the new habit is starting to feel easier. If not, I commit to another 66 days. This method has helped me challenge myself and solidify new habits.
Are you ready to start reshaping your lifestyle habits for a better tomorrow? Begin by identifying one habit you wish to change. Use the steps outlined to understand how this habit serves you and how you can create a healthier relationship with it. Remember, every small step is progress, and every change you make brings you closer to the life you aspire to live.
If you are looking for guidance or need support as you navigate this path, don’t hesitate to reach out. Whether it’s joining the facebook community Wellness Pathways for Fatigue, applying for personalized coaching, or simply sharing your journey with our community, let’s support each other every step of the way.
About the Author
Heather Budd is a National Board Certified Health and Wellness Coach, trained by the Functional Medicine Coaching Academy. She specializes in guiding individuals through lifestyle transformations to manage chronic illness and combat fatigue. With a diverse background in business, leadership and a profound personal health journey, Heather empowers clients to reclaim their health and extend their health span.
Important Information: The information provided in this blog is for informational purposes only and is not intended as a substitute for professional medical or mental health advice, diagnosis, or treatment. While health coaching can support and enhance overall wellness, it is not a substitute for professional medical or mental health care. Always seek the advice of your physician or another qualified health provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition or health objectives. This blog aims to empower you with knowledge and tools to improve your general well-being and help you make informed decisions about your health, but it is not designed to replace professional medical or mental health services.